Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Get ready for June’s strawberry moon - WTOP

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Nvidia tops Microsoft, regains most valuable company title for first time since January - CNBC

I don’t cotton to rapists

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

S.W.A.T. Vet Jay Harrington Breaks Silence on EXILES Surprise: ‘I Did Not Have Spinoff on My Bingo Card’ (Exclusive) - TVLine

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

How Trump broke the politics of Medicaid - Politico

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

If everyone in Russia dropped into holes in the ground only never to return, would that be good for NATO and international peacekeepers? Can we convince Russians to be less diabolical, so they coexist? Does Putin stink like doo doo in the commode?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

What is your age now, and what age do you prefer to stay at forever?

I can count

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

Can omega-6 fatty acids in nuts, vegetable oils lower heart disease and diabetes risk? - Medical News Today

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

Is it true that most women like alpha males?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Sunday Night Baseball Parlay, Picks, Predictions for Yankees vs Red Sox - Action Network

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I understand how hurricane paths work

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

Image of giant volcano on Mars captured by NASA orbiter - ABC News

I can read

I have a reading level above third grade

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

Nintendo Releases First Look At Pokémon Scarlet And Violet Running At 60 FPS On Switch 2 - Game Informer

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I see through liars

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

A child had measles at Mall of America, concerning state health officials who don’t know source - Star Tribune

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Why should you never do drugs? Will this story absolutely shock you?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t buy bullshit

Murder, Sexual Assault, And Massive Fraud: 15 Celebrities Who Are In Jail For A Long Time - BuzzFeed

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I have complete contempt for fakery

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I actually pay taxes

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light